10-11-03,Today I thought about how shy ( and even guilty to a degree) I am at formulating the hunger that's clawing it's way out ofthe very core of my being.
Yes, I loved him, now he's gone - but my hunger for life and love is stampeding it's way out of me.
I can articulate alot of things about myself , but this is so hard. Making me feel that I 'm disrespecting my husbands memory , and feeling myself on the brink of possible "trampiness" !!
I crack myself up though, that'll never happen because I am too darn shy about matters of that nature .I can't even tell bawdy jokes. I still blush when someone else tells them.
Considering that maybe 6 months ago another man ( other than my Tommy )was not even vaguely interesting to me.
I am actually scared of how much emotion/ passion for life is still in me.
I am true to my astrological sign ..Scorpio..
my husband always knew that !